Self-Examination as a Helper (Personal Experience Essay)
I have always been sure that being a helper is an ideal job for me since I have all the necessary experience, knowledge, and skills. Besides, my personal traits will obviously contribute greatly to my work. Finally, I have always had a strong desire to become a helper, which means that I like this job and will do my best to achieve the best possible results. Helper is not a job for everyone, but I think that I am an appropriate candidate.
Kind of a Person I Am
As a person, I am optimistic, friendly and disciplined; my optimism is a base of the way I view life. I believe that life includes both good and bad days and one should be always optimistic, especially in bad ones. Depression kills motivation, while lack of the latter leads to low performance and poor results. Thus, I try to stay optimistic in any situation because it helps me to cope with challenges more effectively. I am also a very open-hearted person; this quality assists me in making new acquaintances and being always in the center of the action. My friendly character helps me to build positive relationships with my colleagues and clients. In addition, it reduces possible conflicts, and those which arise are easier to solve. Being disciplined means a lot for me, and this quality takes its roots from my childhood. In our family, every member has to follow the traditions that are passed from generation to generation. Thus, I grew up as a person who respects others and the order that exists in a group. I believe that everyone should follow rules since it is the only way to unite employees in a team of professionals.
When I need to interact with somebody, my friendly attitude to people often helps me to get what I want. When somebody needs my assistance, I usually try to do my best even if we did not have good relationships in the past. Thus, among my positive patterns of interaction, I can outline willingness to help and enthusiasm. However, there are some cases where even such a friendly person may demonstrate some negative features of the character. I have to accept the fact that people make mistakes from time to time and nobody is perfect. However, there might be such conflicts that may irritate me or even make me mad. For instance, when people make the same mistake again and again and do not carry out a lesson from past situations. I find it difficult to work with such individuals because self-improvement is very important for me and I appreciate this quality in others. However, when I see that a person ignores his/her previous experience and makes the same mistakes again, it irritates me and I do not know how to cooperate with him/her. One more of my negative patterns of interaction is inability to work with people who follow stereotypes of the society they live in or stereotypes that they have made by themselves. Such a way of thinking creates barriers between individuals with different opinions. Hence, when I meet somebody who has a strict opinion about something and is not ready to accept something new because it ruins his/her usual perception of a certain situation or a fact, I may find it difficult to establish a contact with such a person and the future cooperation will also be challenging for me.
Life Experiences and Influences
During my life, I had much experience that influenced my way of thinking, feelings and life in general. When I was 18, my grandfather passed away because of the car accident. This tragedy made me understand the fragility of life and the necessity to appreciate every single day. Since that day I have been trying to live every day of my life as if it was the last one. I want to live without regret that I did not do something in my life and I try to share this principle with those people who surround me. Another important experience happened when I was in an elementary school. Once, I was in trouble and needed assistance, and none of my school friends could help me. I could not share this problem with parents because it was too personal and I thought that they would hardly understand me. Once, when I was sitting in the park depressed and swallowed by my worries, an old woman came to me and asked whether I was all right. She said that I had not to be so sad because other people would not like to be with me, as nobody wants to be with a person who is always sad. After that she added that problems always happen and we can do nothing about this; the only thing we can do is to change our attitude to it. Then she left. I thought much about what she said and I understood that she was right because whatever we do in our life we will always face some challenges as they are an irreplaceable part of our life. Some people are strong enough to cope with them alone, while others cannot do it themselves. Thus, sometimes individuals become so depressed because they cannot solve their problems anymore and without one’s help they cannot make a next step to overcome a current situation. This episode of my life had influenced me a lot and, probably, it shaped my vision as a helper.
In our community, we have a strict hierarchy system, where the younger members of a family should respect the older ones. This tradition makes the young generation be patient, attentive and ready to learn something new. I believe that due to this important message that I received from my community, I will be able to achieve success in my career path as a helper. Another significant message that I have learned was from my family. My mother has always said that by helping others you help yourself. When you aid somebody to become better or to cope with some problems, you receive the same experience as he/she does and when you will face the similar situation, you will know how to react to it and what measures to take. Indeed, this message that I received from my family was useful and helped in my life. The experiences of other people that I shared with them became good real life examples for me.
My ethnicity has a positive effect on my approaches of providing assistance to others. As I mentioned before, my community had a strong impact on my perception of my attitude to others. Hence, it can be said that due to my ethnicity I could realize the necessity of helping in full measure and could provide it effectively in practice assisting not only my relatives, but also other people.
My age also aids me to improve my helping relationships. When you are young, optimistic and energetic, other young people view you as an example of how they should behave in order to cope with difficulties. At the same time, for the older individuals I became a kind of a memory of their young years, when they were also open-hearted, a bit careless and full of enthusiasm. According to this fact, my age brings the advantage when I need to provide assistance both to young and older people.
My interest in helping relationships was not always as high as it is today, or maybe I did not think much about helping as a profession. Since my early years of life, my parents taught me to give a hand to others, especially those people, who cannot do something themselves. For example, when my grandmother found it difficult to buy groceries in the shop, she asked me to do that and I became a helper for her. I assisted my father, mother and other members of the family and it was a norm because all relatives should give a hand to each other, which makes their ties even stronger. However, when I grew up, I realized that help should not be provided only to those people who are close to you as there are also many others who may require one’s aid and cannot do something without physical assistance. I also understood that helping is a wide term that includes more than simple assistance; it can be also a kind of support when a person feels desperate. Hence, the more I started thinking about helping in a wide sense of this term, the more questions I had. I wanted to understand what principles of work helpers apply to assist people with different needs. I reflected on how to become an effective helper who will be able to give a hand in any situation and find a necessary solution that will be useful for individuals who experience various types of problems.
When I deal with a situation that requires my assistance, I may both propose some better solutions and cause additional challenges for the current issue. Every case is unique; it is difficult to identify what actions may cause advantages or disadvantages. Nevertheless, I may outline a few general strong and weak sides of my helping methods. Among my strengths, I may mention my optimism and openness and optimism. The first assists me in creating a specific atmosphere which makes a person believe that his/her situation is not as desperate as it may seem at the first sight and there exist no unsolved problems. Another strong side which is openness aids me at the initial stage when it is necessary to establish contact with an individual who needs my help. Sometimes people who require assistance have already understood that they cannot cope with a problem alone, but they still cannot accept it. Such situations are not unique and they happen from time to time. When a helper is able to accept the circumstances of others with an open heart, it destroys the barriers and misunderstanding that may exist.
In some situations, my assistance may have the opposite result and I am not able to do my work effectively. Not all people who require help experience misery or depression. In some cases, they may be forced to visit a helper, though they do not believe that they require it. As a result, such clients may demonstrate the indifferent attitude to the process or carry on a conversation in an aggressive manner. In such cases, my openness may work in an opposite way and only spoil an attempt to establish a contact. In addition, my calm character does not give me a chance to take some more radical measures that will be appropriate in work with such a person. Hence, being a helper predetermines that I have to be able to deal with different types of situations and demonstrate not only politeness and openness, but also strictness and readiness to cope with aggressive clients.
Being a helper may be a very challenging task sometimes because the specialist may face such problems which will be difficult even for him/her. I also have some types of issues which cause additional obstacles. For example, I find it difficult to help people who refuse to accept the fact that they need assistance. I cannot convince him/her to change something in life, if he/she believes that there is nothing wrong. Another biggest challenge is the issue of ethics. I am a tolerable person and I believe that every situation where the ethical dilemma takes place cannot have a right solution. Thus, when people who face an ethical dilemma ask me for certain assistance, I do not know how to answer because I cannot make such important decision instead of them. In such cases, I feel that my role as a helper is useless since I cannot provide a type of assistance which is expected by others.
Taking into consideration all the above mentioned information, one can see that I am a kind and friendly person who is ready to help those who need it. Moreover, I have certain experience in helping, and I take pleasure in this job because I know that I am useful and can assist others in achieving their goals. Though I am sure I am a suitable candidate for this job, I understand that I should constantly develop and improve my skills. I am open to that and believe that my desire will help me to achieve my goal.